translated_Chapter 95

95: Returning to China

Seeing Qiu Ci’s silence, Tsukimi Rin continued, “Think it over carefully. I don’t know how to say it, but you said something very well back then: Qiu Shi’s death was the best outcome. But you’re different; you just look like her. You’re completely different in every other way. Don’t put so much pressure on yourself.”

“I’ve been alone for five years. I’ve thought about these things more clearly than you have. Don’t worry about me,” Qiu Ci said calmly.

Tsukimi Rin sighed deeply, “You’re impossible. Even if you really didn’t care and just walked away, would you be happy if Jing Yueming remained a widower and never found someone else? Huh?”

“Why would I be upset? When he was dating my sister, I watched them every day, even going to their building late at night to watch,” Qiu Ci said, thinking back and wanting to laugh. It seemed like such a huge deal back then.

“If you really didn’t care, you wouldn’t be thinking about it now. Let’s consider another possibility: Jing Yueming remains a widower for you, and he’s lonely for the rest of his life. Would you be happy watching that?”

Qiu Ci was speechless again. Five years ago, he would have said that Jing Yueming would gradually forget this absurd affair.

But what about those four hundred letters? Would Jing Yueming keep writing them? What would it feel like to never receive a reply?

Tsukimi Rin asked again, “That… the thing about going to the Netherlands, do you dare tell him?”

“I really don’t dare,” Qiu Ci shook his head helplessly.

“See? You’re afraid that if he tries to persuade you to stay, you won’t have the courage to leave. Psychology says that people who want to die actually want to live. But you don’t say anything at all. I’m really worried about you.”

“There’s no way. I can’t waste my life for someone named Jing Yueming. The feeling of having nothing to do is too lonely and painful. It’s better for him to remember me fondly; he’ll eventually move on like you did.”

Tsukimi Rin didn’t know how many times she’d sighed, “Is it… do you still feel guilty about Qiu Shi…? Actually, you regret it too, don’t you? You want me to be free of regrets, but you’ve regretted it for a long time. Her death is related to you. Because of that guilt, you don’t dare be with Jing Yueming, don’t dare to be happy.”

This was indeed Qiu Ci’s concern.

“You guys, you and your sister are both children. Forget it, I’ll take Yue Yue home for the New Year. What are you going to do?” Tsukimi Rin knew she couldn’t persuade Qiu Ci.

“I don’t know, stay in France, or go to the Netherlands early,” Qiu Ci said, looking down at the floor. This house wasn’t new.

“Come home with me, spend time with Yue Yue,” Tsukimi Rin asked tentatively.

Qiu Ci shook his head, “No, China isn’t a good place for me.”

“Alright.”

After Qiu Ci returned to his room, he saw several missed calls and text messages from Jing Yueming.

“Qiu Ci, I have to go back to China first. Come with me.”

Qiu Ci replied, “Be careful. Contact me if you need anything. I’m not going.”

Less than two minutes after sending the message, Jing Yueming called again, “Come back with me, what else are you going to do?”

“Then what am I going back with you for?” Qiu Ci asked.

“Go meet my mom, okay?” Jing Yueming said.

Qiu Ci was puzzled, “Your mom?”

“She’s in Yunnan, come with me. I haven’t seen her in years.”

“You can just go.”

“I want to take you, to meet my parents.” Jing Yueming suddenly realized, what was their relationship now? “Qiu Ci, what is our relationship now? Lovers?”

There was a long silence on the other end. Qiu Ci said coldly, “No.”

“Ah?” Their relationship was unilaterally denied by Qiu Ci.

Qiu Ci repeated, “Be careful when you go back.”

“Okay, I’ll come find you when I’m done. Will you still be in France then?”

“…In the Netherlands.”

“I’ll see if I can get a visa waiver then?”

They chatted for a while before hanging up.

Tsukimi Rin came back. There wasn’t enough food at home, so Qiu Ci prepared to go out to buy some ingredients.

Hai Qing was standing outside the villa.

He was leaning against a tree trunk, chewing on a grass stem. Hearing the sound, he lifted his eyelids and glanced at Qiu Ci, “You’re finally out. You promised you’d do something for me.”

Qiu Ci nodded, “That’s right, you can ask anything.” He didn’t think the little Taoist would make things difficult for him.

Hai Qing spat out the grass stem, “Qiu Ci, right?”

“That’s my name.”

“You… send me home,” Hai Qing said.

“Okay, it’s just a plane ticket. Or do you want a private jet?”

“That’s not necessary, but you have to personally send me back.”

Qiu Ci was helpless. Why did three people in a row want him to return to China? Could there really be some kind of destiny at play?

He laughed at himself. It was probably because he was Chinese, so the people around him were also Chinese. With the Spring Festival approaching, it was only natural to talk about going back to China.

“Hey, why aren’t you talking? You still study Chinese culture, don’t you? A gentleman’s word is as good as his bond. You have to send me whether you want to or not,” Hai Qing said fiercely.

“What can you do to me if I don’t send you? Curse me?” Talking to him, Qiu Ci couldn’t help but become childish.

Hai Qing glared back at him, not willing to be outdone, “You will send me, Qiu Ci! Because you promised me.”

“Okay, when are you leaving?” Qiu Ci conceded. He’d go back for a trip and then come back anyway; he was free right now.

“The sooner, the better,” Hai Qing left those words behind and turned to leave.

Qiu Ci couldn’t figure out what the little guy was thinking. In the evening, he looked at the recent plane tickets, preparing to buy one.

He had Hai Qing’s number saved before. The guy called again, “Qiu Ci, uh, Jing Yueming is also going back. You… buy the same flight with him.”

“Is this the condition he set?” Qiu Ci couldn’t help but suspect.

“Don’t talk nonsense, I’m taking you to see my master.”

“Okay.” Qiu Ci couldn’t figure out what these people were up to.

He packed his luggage simply and went with them.

They met at the airport. Jing Yueming greeted him warmly, “Qiu Ci, I’ll pick you up after you’re done with Hai Qing. Since you’re here anyway.”

“That’s not appropriate. Why should I meet your mom?”

“Just treat it as spending the New Year with me, Qiu Ci. I’m being so good, give me some reward.”

…

They chatted all the way until boarding. Sure enough, Jing Yueming specifically exchanged seats with Hai Qing to sit next to Qiu Ci.

“Qiu Ci! Why are you suddenly so cold to me?” Jing Yueming felt uncomfortable.

Qiu Ci had originally put on an eye mask to sleep, but he opened one eye and looked at Jing Yueming, “What do you think our relationship is? Should I be intimate with you?”

Jing Yueming said without hesitation, “Lovers.”

Qiu Ci was speechless. He put on his eye mask and continued to sleep.

“You really don’t like me? Five years, not a single message. Qiu Ci, is there really no place for me in your future?” Jing Yueming had probably been holding it in for a long time.

Seeing Qiu Ci pretending to sleep, he continued, “You said you’d wait for me. I fulfilled my promise. What about you? Can you come back to my side? Qiu Ci! Do you have someone else again?” Jing Yueming was extremely aggrieved.

Qiu Ci finally took off his eye mask.