ID Chapter 37

Upon arriving at the door after walking down the long hallway on the 5th floor, the members and Go Yu-jin were already deep in conversation.

As soon as they saw me, everyone jumped up from their seats and ran over.

“Oh, Ira, you rascal, it’s so hard to see your face. You’ve gained some weight and look good, don’t you?”

“Ira hyung, it’s really been a long time. I’m glad to see you seem to be doing well.”

“Hey, you… sigh You really… sigh I really have a lot to say…”

Han-sae ruffled my hair, Yadan grabbed my sleeve, and Mun hyung let out deep sighs. I scratched my cheek and smiled amidst them. All three were eager to make eye contact with me again. Even then, Jae-yi was removing Han-sae’s hand from my head.

“Ira.”

Go Yu-jin was just as he sometimes appeared on TV. The righteous, capable, and softly charismatic Doctor Go. Although his gaze seemed a little cooler than before, the way his eyes crinkled when he looked at me was the same as before.

He approached me, slightly lowered his head, and carefully examined my expression.

“You’ve really lost a lot of weight. How hard it must have been.”

“Actually, I’ve gained weight recently. You’re the one who looks like you’ve lost weight?”

“I intentionally lost weight under a thorough plan. …And behind you, your brother?”

“Oh. Min, say hello.”

“Ah, hello!”

Adorably, Min’s voice cracked. I never thought there’d be a day I’d see my brother so lively. I let out a soft laugh. It’s strange, but because of Min, my feelings about Go Yu-jin seem to be fading.

Honestly, I used to feel inferior to Go Yu-jin. I thought if I saw him again, even knowing he wasn’t at fault, I might harbor resentment. But it wasn’t like that at all. Perhaps because of Min, I feel nothing.

Realizing there was no hatred or darkness towards Go Yu-jin in my feelings, my heart felt light.

I kept giggling as I introduced Min to the members, and Go Yu-jin gave me a very strange look.

Huiwanjeon’s formal dishes were served one after another, but I was full and didn’t eat. Instead, Min, who is in his growth spurt, diligently ate my share too.

He’ll probably grow tall like Dad, right? The more he grows, the more Min resembles Dad.

The topic related to contract termination was brought up first by Go Yu-jin.

“If you leave Shik City, have you thought about where you’ll sign a contract?”

“That’s for later. For now, Shik City doesn’t want to let us go, so my mother said a lawsuit has even been mentioned.”

“File a lawsuit. They neglected Ira to that extent, so the law will side with you. Receiving food containing cyanide from a so-called fan, and his pet dog eating it and dying. Even if you consider that unavoidable for a company up to that point, their subsequent handling was a mess. No one will take their side.”

I, who had picked up a water cup to drink, tried to act as naturally as possible, but I visibly flinched. Before bringing up Mallang-i, I wish someone would warn me they’re about to mention Mallang-i. Mallang-i died in so much agony.

The sight resurfaced, making my head feel dizzy.

“Once again, Ira, I’m sorry. I should have handled it cleanly, but everyone thought you’d quickly gain popularity.”

Nausea welled up. But I could endure it. I calmly opened my mouth.

“Hyung, I told you not to apologize to me. Mun hyung, and all of you. Don’t feel unnecessarily sorry. Because it’s not your fault, nor is it mine.”

“Hey, honestly… even if you say that, we’ll feel guilty if we don’t apologize to you.”

Han-sae mumbled.

“I’m sorry for misunderstanding you and saying harsh things back then. Damn… I can apologize for this, right? Because it was my fault.”

“I’m sorry too… for cornering you. Far from being a reliable hyung, I only added more burdens on you.”

Everyone wanted to apologize to me. Haha… The nausea inside me subsided a little, and I chuckled.

How should I explain my strange psychology?

I clearly thought I didn’t need their apologies, but once I received them, it felt like a weight had been lifted.

It was a knot I hadn’t even known was there before receiving the apologies.

“Alright. Then… no more apologies after today.”

“Damn… you rascal, you’re acting so solemn. I’m not going to apologize even if I steal your clothes.”

“Hey, that’s a different situation. Are you kidding me?”

“Dammit. I don’t care. You said apologies end today. I’m going to steal all your clothes and hats and wear them.”

“You son of a bitch. Just try wearing them. I’ll tear your clothes apart.”

“They won’t even fit you. Haha. Ira’s clothes will rip.”

Go Yu-jin laughed loudly. Mun hyung chuckled, and Yadan was quietly smiling.

I remembered the old days. Before Endorphin’s debut was decided, there were many other trainees, but just us six got along well. Go Yu-jin was at the center, always gentle and mild, but sometimes he’d make us laugh with “fact violence.” Squabbling and fighting was my and Han-sae’s job. When Mun hyung would nag us to be more like the composed Yadan, Yadan would awkwardly intervene to stop our fights.

And Jae-yi… always sided with me. I think he’d side with me by saying some truly ridiculous nonsense.

“Don’t even think about wearing Ira’s clothes. Because I’m going to wear them.”

Like this.

I briefly imagined Jae-yi wearing my clothes, and my clothes looked so pitiful.

“Ah, Jae-yi, your jokes are incredibly bland. But hey, I haven’t seen that outfit before? Do you even know how to buy clothes?”

“Oh, Kwon Jin-ho hyung bought them for me.”

“Kwon Jin-ho hyung?”

“He’s Kwon Su-han’s younger brother, and he works at the National Forensic Service. He sometimes visits the house, and he seems to be an Endorphin fan.”

“…….”

Jae-yi’s expression hardened. Should I have just said he was an acquaintance? No, they would have questioned me anyway.

“That’s right. Ira, you’re staying at Aura Adapter Kwon Su-han’s house, aren’t you? I thought he was a bit cold and aloof when I met him once before. Is it okay living with him?”

“You’ve seen it too, hyung? He’s really good, unlike how he looks. These days, his daily routine is rolling around in his bed, browsing fan sites on his phone.”

“Bed…?”

Jae-yi mumbled softly. I realized my mistake when I saw his blazing eyes, but I had no choice but to pretend not to notice and avert my gaze.

“This rascal, I knew he’d put on some weight, but he was really living comfortably. This hyung-nim feels relieved.”

“Hyung, you posted on SNS. Are you starting again?”

“I’m going to start slowly. I’ll give the fans everything I couldn’t give them before, to their heart’s content.”

“That’s a good idea. The fans will like it. I like it too.”

Yadan smiled brightly as if my words about starting SNS sounded like we’d hit number one on the music charts. His cuteness made me reach across and pat his head.

Clang.

I was startled by the shattering sound from nearby and looked. Yi Min, who was eating a fruit dessert alone, dropped his fork and looked between Yadan and me.

“What’s wrong? Ira’s younger brother, did you bite into a fruit peel or something?”

“No. It’s nothing.”

It didn’t seem like nothing. The kid, who had been diligently picking at his food, suddenly pouted, picked up his fork, and stirred the fruit around.

“Min-ah, if you stir it all up, others can’t eat it.”

“Haha, just leave him. Yi Min is tall and cool despite his young age. It looks like another excellent Motioner will appear in our world.”

Go Yu-jin hyung smiled gently at Yi Min. Yi Min, who had seemed sulky for some reason, immediately brightened up at Go Yu-jin hyung’s compliment. Well, it’s a time when emotions change rapidly, the mid-teens. I know that well because I was like that too.

After that, we talked a lot. I was a little surprised when Go Yu-jin hyung said he still goes to the fan cafe and reads all the letters. He had said he would cut off everything related to idol activities when he entered politics, but it seems the fans’ support was hard to break away from after all.

Thanks to Go Yu-jin hyung, Yi Min also shed his shyness and quickly became talkative. When he said he wanted to join the Aura Ball League, Go Yu-jin hyung offered sweet words, saying he would do well.

Jae-yi had been silent since the “bed” comment. I kept glancing nervously at Jae-yi. But there was someone else besides me who was watching Jae-yi’s mood. It was Mun hyung.

“Ira, we’ve all finished unpacking at the dorm. We brought your luggage in boxes, but you might have missed something, so why don’t you go check?”

“Oh, those boxes were mine? Thanks. I actually brought three backpacks anyway.”

“Since it came up, why don’t you go organize it now? It’ll be heavy to carry alone, so it would be good if Jae-yi helped.”

“Oh, yeah. Go and come back. Let’s do a second and third round of everything here.”

Mun hyung, having watched Jae-yi’s mood for long enough, tried to send just Jae-yi and me away.

Did he mean for us to tie things up properly since we both seemed to be lingering?

I think I need that time too.

My eyes met Jae-yi’s. He was already taking out his car keys.

“Min-ah, let’s go. I’ll take you to the hotel.”

I couldn’t leave Yi Min alone, so I called him. Yi Min, who had been completely absorbed in the anecdotes of the Aura Ball League players that Go Yu-jin hyung was telling, got up reluctantly. Since he couldn’t bring himself to ask the guys for autographs until the very end, I nudged Jae-yi and told him to sign and take pictures with them.

Click.

We all took a group photo and signed albums one by one. Including Go Yu-jin hyung, there were five of us. Since I’m his older brother, it’s natural that my autograph wasn’t requested. It’s something to be grateful for that Go Yu-jin hyung is signing. Yet, my chest felt a pang, and I slightly reflected that I truly have a greedy personality.

“Looking at you like this, you really don’t look alike.”

Go Yu-jin hyung smiled and said, seeing Yi Min and me standing side by side. We both flinched in surprise.

“Oh, you really don’t look alike. I was completely surprised when I first saw you. Is it because the younger brother is a Motioner and Ira is a Souler?”

“Min-ah, don’t ignore your hyung just because he’s small; you should treat him well. It’s rare to find a hyung who treats his younger brother this well.”

“…Ah, yes…”

Go Yu-jin hyung smiled and stroked Yi Min’s head. Yi Min’s face was noticeably stiff. I quickly grabbed Yi Min’s hand and pulled him along.

“Don’t worry. He’s so mature. Among the Endorphin members, Yi Min is probably the nicest, you know?”

“Whoa, Ira’s drawing widespread aggro. Hyungs with younger siblings and Jae-yi, quickly give Ira a good scolding!”

“No… My younger brother is really not as nice as Ira’s. Han-sae, I’ll give him to you, please take him.”

“No… Your younger brother, I also kind of…”

The members burst into laughter at the exchange between Mun hyung and Han-sae. I also forced a smile, but my heart pounded. So hard I worried Jae-yi might hear it.

And Go Yu-jin hyung watched Yi Min with a smile.

Even as we gathered our backpacks and left, hyung’s gaze remained fixed on Yi Min. They say S-class Soul Aura Users have excellent intuition, so did he sense something from Yi Min and me? I pretended not to notice his persistent gaze and stepped outside.

After dropping Yi Min off in front of the hotel, we moved back to the dorm. I was on my phone next to Jae-yi as he drove. I’m completely addicted these days and can’t tear myself away from the fan cafe. Jae-yi seemed pleased, smiling when he knew I was on the fan cafe.

“It’ll take a while to read all the unread letters. Be careful not to strain your eyes.”

“Yeah. Hey, but there’s something I don’t understand. Why do they ‘destroy apartments’ when I’m cute?”

“When something is cute and pretty, people naturally ‘destroy walls’ and ‘destroy apartments.’ I’ve ‘destroyed the Earth’ a few times because of you too.”

“…….”

Seriously, with that Black Panther-like face, he says such things so nonchalantly…

Embarrassed, I focused only on my phone. There were many letters saying, ‘Today was so much fun. Oppa, why is your variety sense so good???’ It seemed I had been on a variety show that day. Many GIFs were uploaded too. Ah, that’s right, it was when we played the game of passing paper with our mouths. It all came back to me.

-Buzz.

My phone vibrated, and the screen changed. The caller was Kwon Su-han.

I glanced at Jae-yi. For Jae-yi, who was concentrating on driving, I shouldn’t answer this call. I’d better hang up and send a message. I pressed decline and was typing [CantTalkNow] when the phone rang again. I hung up again, and he immediately called back. At this point… I was worried. Why call three times? Is something wrong?

“Why aren’t you answering?”

Jae-yi spoke in a low voice.

“Who is it that you’re not answering? Is it that Adapter?”

“…Yeah.”

That uncanny guy.

“Answer the phone.”

Is it okay to answer? I checked Jae-yi’s expression again. Unlike his voice, his eyes were burning, and veins protruded on the back of the hand gripping the steering wheel. But I decided to interpret it as him saying it was okay to answer because I wanted to take the call. I covered my mouth and touched the call button.

“What is it? I’m busy right now, is something wrong?”

-…….

“Kwon Su-han?”

Kwon Su-han let out a long sigh without a word.

-What are you so busy with that you hung up twice?

A chilling anger was in his voice.

“No, I just… came out.”

-Outside, where?

“I’m on my way to the dorm to pack my things.”

-Alone? How are you getting there?

I couldn’t bring myself to answer. I don’t know why it was so difficult to say that I was in a car with Jae-yi.

“Just riding in a friend’s car. What are you doing, hyung? Have you eaten? From now on, you should also send me pictures of your food bowl, hyung.”

-…Do you have a lot of things to bring from the dorm?

“No. About three backpacks?”

-I’ll go help.

“What? Aren’t you busy with work?”

-I’m all done now.

-It’s not over yet, sir!

-Where are you going?!

Along with rustling sounds, voices trying to stop Kwon Su-han could be heard. There were both women and men.

“It’s not over yet, is it?”

-It’s ov…

-It’s not over, Ira! It’s not over, so please stop him… sniff.

A loud clattering sound was heard, then the voices cut off. I was dumbfounded when I heard my name. It was really funny, but on the other hand, it made me uncomfortable, as if I was making someone who was working hard slack off for no reason.

I covered my mouth, pressed myself against the window, and spoke in the quietest voice possible.

“Kwon Su-han, please finish your work and then come. I’ll be sitting in the living room, waiting nicely, by the time you arrive.”

-…….

“Really, hyung, by the time you arrive at the dorm, I’ll probably be done and gone, you know? It’d be a wasted trip if you came.”

-…Alright, I understand. I’ll go after I finish work, so it would be good if you answered the phone right away. Don’t follow strangers. Contact me every time you move. And be sure to tell me if your schedule changes.

How old am I? Was I eleven?

“Why are you so worried? I’ll take care of myself.”

I chuckled and replied. Even after coaxing Kwon Su-han and hanging up, I still had a smile on my face.

So even someone like this dislikes working, just the same. I’m curious what kind of work he does. It seems like some kind of psychological observation, but I’ll ask him when he comes.

“…You seem happy. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen you laugh like that.”

Jae-yi whispered sadly, and I suddenly came to my senses.

Jae-yi was looking straight ahead. As if deliberately avoiding looking my way. I didn’t answer.

After finishing packing, I looked around the empty dorm one last time. Nine months… it wasn’t that long, but it was certainly eventful.

It wasn’t just difficult memories. There were definitely times when we laughed, chatted, and had fun, like when our song hit number one, but those moments were very brief. After the cyanide, I was even afraid to come to the dorm. I was scared the culprit might be waiting for me in my closet, and whenever I lay in bed, I was tormented by visions of a dead Mallang-i.

Goodbye now.

I bid farewell by closing and then opening my eyes.

“Ira.”

Jae-yi called me, sitting on the living room sofa.

Yes, now with you too…

I calmly walked forward.