Mistakenly Took a Parody Fanfic as the Real Plot

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Xie Shiwei died suddenly from overwork—only to wake up inside a melodramatic dog-blood novel as a cannon-fodder young master.

In the original story, the character relentlessly pestered the cold and aloof He Qin, even forcing him into marriage. But the “happy ending” was anything but: together with the shou protagonist and a greedy stepmother, He Qin destroyed him, leaving him ruined and broken.

When Xie Shiwei transmigrates in, it happens to be his wedding day with He Qin. And he suddenly remembers a critical detail from the story:

He Qin… couldn’t perform. Two minutes at most.

From then on, every glance at He Qin was colored with complicated thoughts.

To rewrite his fate, Xie Shiwei decided to play it smart. He Qin swore never to touch him—Xie thought, Great, perfect, and tearfully nodded. He Qin promised they’d divorce after one year—Xie thought, Even better, and tearfully agreed.

So he spent his days freeloading off He Qin’s good looks, scheming to push him toward the original shou protagonist, guarding his inheritance from his stepmother, flirting with handsome men, and happily counting down the days until divorce.

But later—
He Qin, in a loose bathrobe: “This marriage… let’s not end it just yet.”
Leaning close to his ear: “And those men—you’d better stop chasing them too.”

Turns out He Qin wasn’t as heartless as the novel claimed. In fact, he was falling hard. But while He Qin plotted seduction, Xie Shiwei only saw him as a friend, even asking his advice before flirting with other men.

Jealousy boiled over, and the untouchable CEO personally set out to tempt him—pushing, pulling, teasing, until Xie Shiwei’s face flushed and his heart raced. Victory seemed certain.

Until Xie Shiwei calmly said: “This marriage… let’s still get divorced.”

One day, explaining himself to a friend, Xie Shiwei sighed:
“Honestly, the problem is… He Qin just can’t do it.”

Overhearing this, He Qin nearly exploded.
“Who told you I can’t?!”

That night, Xie Shiwei realized he had made a huge mistake.
Because the “performance issue” wasn’t in the real story at all—
…it was from a parody fanfic.

Oops.