SM Chapter 33

Chapter 33: Tit for Tat

“I also think it’s good to grow up…”

In the afternoon, they had tea and chatted, and after the New Year’s Eve dinner, they played mahjong.

Tan Zhi Xu came downstairs and saw Zhu Shihao sitting at the mahjong table, with Zhu Yingqing guiding her on the side. But it was clear that the two of them had a disagreement, and her delicate eyebrows were furrowed.

“Shihao, do you want to play with sparklers?”

Her hesitant thoughts were interrupted. After a second of processing what he said, Zhu Shihao immediately got up, grabbed Zhu Yingqing’s arm, and pressed him back into the seat. “Dad, you play.”

Liu Ruoyin said with slight disdain, “You’re so old, still playing with sparklers? That’s for Jia Jia.”

“Zhi Xu said so, he’s playing too. Why don’t you say something to him?” She snorted at Liu Ruoyin, unconvinced.

“I don’t even want to expose you. Does Zhi Xu want to play? It’s clearly you who wants to play, and he’s keeping you company, okay?” Liu Ruoyin said hastily, “Oh, wait, I almost forgot to call a tile while talking to her.”

Xu Ting didn’t even look up, waving her hand at them. “You two go play. Zhi Xu, keep an eye on Shihao.”

As soon as this instruction came out, all four adults at the table nodded, none of them feeling that there was anything wrong with telling two twenty-six or twenty-seven-year-olds this.

Tan Zhi Xu casually hummed in acknowledgement, flicked her forehead with his finger. “Let’s go, let’s play in the yard.”

Large fireworks naturally couldn’t be set off casually, but no one cared about these little things for entertaining children, sparklers that could be played with in the yard or at home. However, what he called sparklers were actually more than just that.

Zhu Shihao, standing two meters away, watched Tan Zhi Xu squatting on the ground, even his actions of lighting the fireworks were lazy, and she couldn’t help but urge him.

“Hurry up, or you’ll set your clothes and hair on fire.”

Tan Zhi Xu took two big steps and returned to her side. The two of them watched the small fireworks in front of them, only about as tall as a person. Like its name, the sparks landed on the ground like pearls splattering all over the dark.

The not-so-bright lights, the dazzling fireworks, and the bright moonlight.

But none of these were as captivating as the person in front of her. Most of Tan Zhi Xu’s attention was on her, turning his head to look at her from time to time.

In the dim light, every change in her expression fell into his eyes with the help of the light from the fireworks. The light and shadow were blurry, but she was clearly imprinted in his heart, peaceful and comfortable, extremely satisfying.

“I’ll light it for you.” He pinched a delicate and expensive lighter, but didn’t light the fireworks for her as she asked.

She was a little afraid of lighting those, but lighting sparklers was no problem.

However, she only paused for a second, and her nodding motion seemed very well-behaved. “Okay, you light it for me.”

His thumb slid, and a flame popped out, a small cluster, the range covered by the halo was also narrow, able to illuminate his well-defined hands, even and clean, but not able to illuminate his reddened knuckles.

But she couldn’t be any clearer. She seemed to have held these hands thousands of times, had seen every part of them countless times, even the faint mole on the left side of his right middle finger, almost invisible, she could point to it with her eyes closed, near the base of his finger.

She waved the sparklers with both hands, one after another, smiling brightly.

Tan Zhi Xu lazily pulled out one and lit it for himself.

“Shihao.”

“Mmm?”

“If you can’t find someone who can take good care of you, it’s okay to stay single. I’ll take care of you.”

The distance between them was only a palm’s width. His voice was light, but it entered her ears with unusual clarity.

Zhu Shihao’s motion of drawing circles gradually slowed down, and after a long while, she said,

“Will you always take care of me? What if you fall in love and get married?”

That bit of fire burned out and died, suddenly losing its light, and the faces of the two people became blurred.

Tan Zhi Xu took out a new one for her, the lighter made a faint sound, especially obvious in the dark night.

“No, I’ll wait for you to find someone first.”

As he spoke, the light reappeared, the sparks scattered, Zhu Shihao saw the serious look on his face at this moment.

But that’s not what I want.

Noticing her gaze, Tan Zhi Xu also raised his eyelids to look back at her.

“Shihao, no matter what, you don’t have to wrong yourself, and you can’t wrong yourself.”

Otherwise, on what basis?

The flower I painstakingly cared for can’t wither in someone else’s hands. It should continue to be delicate and beautiful, always in full bloom.

Aunt Wang packed up and went home, and her parents were all inside playing cards. The door was closed, and in this large yard, only the two of them were half-hidden in the dimness.

Her suppressed longing for so long suddenly couldn’t be suppressed any longer.

Releasing her fingers, the burning sparkler fell to the ground.

Quickly standing in front of him, Zhu Shihao raised her hand to grab the clothes around his waist, and kissed his lips on tiptoe.

She dared to do this, Tan Zhi Xu would only be even bolder than her.

He wrapped his arm around her waist, the loose clothes were pulled tightly against her body, hooking her chin, taking the initiative to hold her lips, probing, entangling, and sucking.

The kiss was involved enough, and he let go of her.

Zhu Shihao leaned against him a little weakly, supported by his waist, gently stroking her spine to soothe her.

“Zhi Xu, look, you can completely block me out.”

The tall man was enough to completely envelop her. Nestled in his arms, she didn’t seem to have to worry about anything. This sense of security wasn’t given by a strong body. When Tan Zhi Xu was still young and thin, he was already Zhu Shihao’s protector.

Tan Zhi Xu hummed lowly, lowered his eyes and looked at her eyes that were brighter than the stars and moon. “Yes, you can do whatever you want.”

“Can I be unscrupulous and do whatever I want?”

For a while now, he seemed to like touching her face, a very gentle movement, as if stroking some rare treasure.

He said, “Yes, I’m here.”

No matter what, Tan Zhi Xu could be there to back her up.

She opened her mouth, then silently closed it again.

The sentence “Can I want you?” almost slipped out, but luckily she came back to her senses at the last moment. Zhu Shihao lowered her eyes and stared at the fireworks on the ground that were gradually disappearing, without speaking.

In the dim and blurry light and shadow, Tan Zhi Xu could only barely see half of her face, and couldn’t make out her expression very clearly.

After playing for a while, Tan Zhi Xu covered the back of her hand with his large palm, his brow furrowing at the icy cold touch.

“Why are you so cold? Do you still want to play? Did you bring gloves? I’ll go get them for you.”

Saying that she was too cold, his big hand tightly clasped hers, his body temperature, which was always higher than hers, spread over through heat transfer.

“No.” Zhu Shihao shook her head. “Zhi Xu, let’s play for a while longer.”

Tan Zhi Xu stared at her for two seconds, helplessness highlighted in his calm expression. “You haven’t had enough?”

She slightly raised her chin, a pair of extremely beautiful eyes watching him. “But I still want to be with you for a while.”

What a foul play of words.

His breath paused, and he only felt his heart clenching.

The next second, Tan Zhi Xu gave her a gentle kiss on the tip of her nose. “Okay, I want to too, but you can’t get sick. Let’s go back, shall we elope tonight?”

She was always a good child who could listen to what was said, nodding and agreeing.

Following one step behind him, what was best about walking behind him was that she could look at him unscrupulously. Even if he noticed her gaze, she wouldn’t have to panic, nor would she have to hide the surging emotions in her eyes.

If he asked, “Why are you staring at me?” she could say naturally, as she had countless times in the past, “You’re good-looking.” After saying that, he would laugh it off.

Lovers whispering and intertwined when no one was around, adhering to the measure of friends when people were around. Clearly they had done the most intimate things in the world, but it was still difficult to cross that boundary of constraint.

What she wanted to be was the lover in the Qixi Festival, not a clandestine lover.

“What are you thinking about? You’re walking slower and slower. Hurry up, don’t catch a cold.” Tan Zhi Xu knew she was looking at him, but he didn’t expect that when he looked back, he would find that she was getting further and further away from him.

Zhu Shihao slowly “Oh”ed, affected by the sudden surge of emotions, and as if deliberately going against him out of sullenness, not only did she not hurry up, but even the size of her steps was reduced by half.

Seriously, how could someone be like this even after more than twenty years?

Tan Zhi Xu strode back and pulled her over.

“The way you stubbornly sulk is still like a child.”

She lowered her head. In her vision, his hand was holding her, transmitting familiar warmth.

The difference in body shape between men and women is often clear and distinct, but occasionally it’s strange. Clearly they grew up together, but when did their hands stop being the same size?

From the time she realized that she and Tan Zhi Xu should have a clear line between them, he already seemed tall and big, and his hands were already big enough to envelop hers.

Unfortunately, before she could take action, she had already fallen. All the distance later was her suppression and restraint.

“Zhi Xu, is it better to be grown-up or to be a child?”

Tan Zhi Xu thought for two seconds. “I think it’s better to be grown-up, but you can be an adult or a child.”

That’s what he would say, Tan Zhi Xu always seemed to be like this.

Although it sounds strange to say so, he really took care of her more like a child than her parents did. While her parents would say “You’re so old,” “How old are you,” “You should…” only this person would ask “What do you want,” “How do you want to do it.”

Apart from three meals a day, apart from taking good care of herself, Tan Zhi Xu seemed to have no requirements of her.

Zhu Shihao gently “Mmm”ed. “I also think it’s better to be grown-up.”

An un-grown-up Zhu Shihao could only hide that love letter in a cardboard box, and could do nothing but pretend that it never happened. And the current Zhu Shihao could have her hand held by him, could be held tightly in his arms and sleep in the same bed.

The expectations produced by this comparison suddenly filled up.

She gently swayed the hand being held, her voice soft and small. “Zhi Xu.”

“Mmm?” He didn’t turn his head, nor did he stop walking.

“Zhi Xu, I want to sleep with you.”

Her voice was clearly very soft, just entering his ears hazily with the night wind, unusually clear, every word and even its final sound were distinct, so light, yet so heavily knocking on his heart.

Tan Zhi Xu’s steps paused, the person walking behind him was pulled back.

Looking up at him, her bright features were hazy and bright under the dim light, her eyes revealing a bit of doubt.

She tilted her small face slightly, and he slightly held his chin, gazing down at her, a pair of dark eyes even more deep, but his emotions were easy to understand, expressing his pampering and helplessness without any disguise.

“Saying things like that is foul play, Shihao.”

When calling her name, Tan Zhi Xu was always full of emotion, completely different from his usual cold indifference.

She liked to listen to it very much.

Zhu Shihao tilted her head at him, her expression showing some cunning. “Then do you agree or not?”

“I agree, I couldn’t wish for more.”

He continued to walk back while holding her hand.

“Besides, when have I ever not agreed to your requests?”

Zhu Shihao’s eyes rolled, talking with conviction, deliberately provoking him.

“Yes, you have.”

“Mmm? When?”

In his programming, it seemed that there was no setting for rejecting Zhu Shihao. Of course, her deliberately acting weird and singing the opposite tune didn’t count.

Zhu Shihao suppressed the corners of her mouth that wanted to rise, and repeated the old story in a serious manner. “Back then, I asked you to return my love letter, but you didn’t, and you even gave it to my mom. Have you forgotten?”

His steps paused, but he didn’t stop, but she clearly felt the hand being held gripped forcefully, with a strong warning.

“Forgot?”

What a load of crap, this rascal, sooner or later she’d expose him! If it weren’t for him, maybe Zhu Shihao could have scored twenty points higher. At such a young age, he didn’t study hard himself, and even corrupted other people’s good children.

Zhu Shihao pouted and “Yeesh”ed, deliberately dragging out the long tone, winding and turning, clearly sighing in disbelief.

Tan Zhi Xu sneered, glancing at her sideways, reminding her with a smile that wasn’t a smile, hinting at something.

“Yes, I couldn’t beat you before, and I couldn’t bear to beat you, but now I can change the way. I can bear to.”

She raised her other hand to cover her ears, like an ostrich burying its head in the sand, shaking her head while muttering to herself, “Can’t hear, can’t hear.”

On the side closer to him, the unengaged hand couldn’t cover her ear, and his low laughter directly drilled into her ear, bringing a burst of itchy feeling, directly reaching her heart.

That “couldn’t bear to” was clearly a consensus reached by both parties since childhood, but these three words seemed too ambiguous between opposite-sex friends, to the point that they had never been spoken.

Even knowing that the “before” in his words wasn’t that meaning, at this moment, her heart was pounding fiercely, but she didn’t dare to raise her hand to press her chest to calm her heart down.

Would the heartbeat be very loud? Would Zhi Xu hear it?

For a moment, Zhu Shihao didn’t know how much was nervousness, how much was trepidation, and how much was secret expectation.