Chapter 17 Part 1

Lee Jun’s feet were heavy as he walked home. It wasn’t because he had been drinking. On the contrary, his body felt lighter than ever due to the alcohol. It was his heart that was heavy.

“I was just spineless and easy to take advantage of, wasn’t I?”

He rushed over at a text message telling him to come and couldn’t even properly refute anything Chaeheon said. Just coming when told to, drinking when asked to drink.

“I’m like a damn dog.”

Lee Jun let out a self-deprecating laugh. The reason he felt pathetic was that despite being constantly swayed, he didn’t entirely dislike it. If they had broken up, he should have made his stance clear, but his too-light shoulders made him despair and just let things be. Still, it wasn’t entirely hopeless.

A year at most. Excluding vacation, it was actually less than a year.

If they just spent a reasonable amount of time together, they could break up quickly. Thinking that way, it didn’t seem like a big deal, but…

“Brother.”

Just as Lee Jun opened the front door and entered, his eyes met Haein’s, who was drinking water. Haein, who resembled Lee Jun but with softer features, put down her water glass and approached him.

“Why are you so late?”

“It just happened. Where’s Hae Sol?”

“She’s sleeping with Mom. I let her play in the water with her neck float today, and she’s sleeping so well.”

“Okay.”

Confirming that Hae Sol was asleep, Lee Jun crossed the living room. Haein then stuck close to him and looked at Lee Jun’s clothes.

“These are clothes I haven’t seen before?”

Lee Jun paused, then looked down at his own clothes. Chaeheon had said they smelled of someone else, and now Haein immediately noticed they were someone else’s clothes.

“Whose are they?”

“The owner’s.”

“Why did he give them to you?”

Haein followed closely behind Lee Jun, asking questions. Her gaze, both questioning and curious, followed Lee Jun with an uncomfortable persistence.

“Because my clothes got splashed with dirty water because of the owner.”

“So, he gave you other clothes to wear instead of the ones that got splashed with dirty water?”

“Yeah.”

“But that’s strange. You can wear a uniform there, right? Since it’s a shirt and pants, you could have just worn that home. Why did he specifically give you clothes?”

Lee Jun tried to vaguely dismiss the topic of the clothes, but for some reason, Haein kept pressing him today.

“He probably just cared. I just need to wash them and give them back.”

“Did the owner tell you to?”

“Then should I just wear them around?”

“No, that’s not what I mean…”

Haein tapped her chest as if frustrated, then went into the kitchen. Lee Jun didn’t know what she was frustrated about, but he concluded the conversation was over.

“I’m going to work, so don’t come in.”

Lee Jun raised his voice, shouting so only Haein in the kitchen could hear, then walked to his room. He tossed the bag he had casually slung over his shoulder aside and flopped onto his chair. He needed to start working immediately, but his mind wasn’t easily settling down.

Haein had asked about the clothes because she was curious, but for him, the events with Chaeheon kept replaying in his mind. That’s why he wanted to be alone, and his heart felt restless.

Lee Jun clenched and unclenched his hands several times, took a deep breath, then straightened his heavy body in the chair and turned on his computer. While he started the program and placed his hands on the keyboard, Lee Jun saw his own face reflected on the screen.

It was an ordinary face, with nothing special about it apart from skin that was slightly fairer than others. Perhaps because his pigmentation was light, his appearance tended to blend in with others, yet Chaeheon would sometimes stare intently at Lee Jun’s face.

Because of that gaze, he couldn’t ignore him, and eventually… The sound of the door opening interrupted Lee Jun’s thoughts, and he turned his head.

“I told you not to come in.”

Lee Jun quickly straightened his back, pretending to have been working.

“You weren’t working anyway.”

Haein grumbled in response, and instead of leaving, she walked right in and closed the door. Lee Jun, whose mind was cluttered and who wanted to be alone, pointlessly opened a project in the program and moved his mouse. With only the sound of keyboard clicks and the mouse’s clatter, no one spoke. As Lee Jun gradually focused on his work, Haein blurted out.

“Is something wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“Your face doesn’t say ‘nothing’.”

Lee Jun fell silent. As Haein nervously tapped her feet, her bottom slightly lifted and settled on the bed.

“Brother.”

“Hmm?”

“By any chance… it’s about Hae Sol.”

At Haein’s cautious voice, Lee Jun paused, then turned to look at her. Haein, whose mood was lower than usual, seemed to have been waiting for Lee Jun all along.

“Why? Is something wrong with Hae Sol?”

“No, it’s not that…”

As Haein shook her head in denial, Lee Jun’s tense body relaxed.

“I was just wondering if anyone has been asking about Hae Sol.”

“…”

Lee Jun had just been with Chaeheon. He was surprised when Chaeheon mentioned he smelled like a baby, and he even drank alcohol to try and mask it. It felt as if Haein knew about it and was asking, so he couldn’t easily dismiss it.

“…No.”

Because nothing had been confirmed yet.

That’s why he couldn’t say anything to Haein.

On a morning like any other, Lee Jun arrived at the classroom and was reading his major textbook. However, the words weren’t sinking in, and Lee Jun couldn’t seem to turn the page. With a somewhat hazy gaze, Lee Jun replayed the conversation he had with Haein.

‘I was just wondering if anyone has been asking about Hae Sol.’

Chaeheon had already asked why he had suddenly broken up with him without a word back then, and also about the baby’s scent, yet Lee Jun couldn’t be honest with Haein.

‘What should I do?’

It didn’t seem like he could keep hiding it forever. If Chaeheon knew nothing, it would be one thing, but now the situation had changed. Since he had smelled the baby on him, Lee Jun needed a way to prevent him from digging deeper into it.

‘If I ignore Chaeheon, he’ll just cling to me even more.’

He might even bring those men he saw last time to investigate something. He wondered if he should just stay by his side to keep him from thinking about other things, but he couldn’t think of any other way.

Lee Jun let out a long sigh.

“Why the sigh so early in the morning?”

Lee Jun, seeing an iced americano placed in front of him, raised his head. His gaze followed the long fingers holding the disposable plastic cup, ending at a prominent nose.

“Did you sleep well?”

At Chaeheon’s gentle smile, Lee Jun wondered if he should say what was immediately on his mind.

“Did you come just to give me coffee?”

“Partly for that, and partly to sit next to you.”